Separation or Divorce
Divorce is a time of profound change. It rocks the foundation of most people’s lives. Hearts are broken, and dreams are shattered.
Like Sally and Danielle, maybe you’re not sure which way to turn as the result of a separation or divorce.
The children don’t understand what happened.
Sally hates having to help her children pack for their weekend with their father, her ex-husband. The weekends are his in their “temporary custody arrangement.”
Her kids’ hearts break when he returns them home after their weekends together. Her heart breaks for them… and for herself.
Her son, Bobby, wakes up crying at night wondering when Daddy is coming back home. Her daughter, Kim, promises that she “will be good, if Daddy will come back and live with us.”
Sally told them, over and over, that it’s not their fault and that Daddy still loves them.
She thought their love would last forever.
Now, their family has been reduced to single parenting, co-parenting, custody arrangements, financial settlements, and lawyers.
Sally wants to fall apart and hide. But, she can’t. She has to be there for her kids. How can she take care of them when she feels like she can’t even take care of herself?
This was NOT the plan!
How’d I end up here?
Danielle’s parents divorced when she was a kid, and she’d vowed that would not happen to her marriage…
But, her divorce was finalized two months ago. It had been two years since he walked out. She recalled her ex-husband’s words: “I’m not in love with you anymore… I’ve met someone else… We want to get married.”
It felt like a punch to the gut – and still does.
Danielle vowed to love him “til death do us part,” but she had no idea that “death” would come so soon. Because that’s what it feels like – like someone died.
Her happily-ever-after, her dreams of them traveling together in retirement, having grandkids together, growing old together…
Dead.
How on earth does she move on and start over?
How does she get over it?
There’s no such thing as an “easy” divorce.
There’s a reason why separation and divorce are on the list of Top 10 stressors. Even “amicable” partings are still a loss.
Things change in a big way. Housing changes, financial changes, parenting changes… the list goes on.
No matter how you look at it… it’s a lot of change!
Even if you perceive some of the change as positive, it doesn’t make it any less challenging. And let’s face it, most separations and divorces are less than amicable.
Counseling can offer support and hope during a time when you can often feel isolated and hopeless.
If you are feeling overwhelmed or lost as a result of a separation or divorce, don’t continue to struggle alone. We can help. Give us a call today.
